Growing up

It is late and I should be sleeping but I can't. My babies start mothers day out in the morning, technically today. I am a nervous wreck. We did the mothers day out thing last summer with babykins and she had a terrible time dealing with it, I was also big as a house pregnant and emotional. I stood out in the hall crying while she cried in her classroom. This happened every single time I took her, so I am very nervous about this time. Both of my babies are going. Fatboy can't really talk yet so that worries me, I want the kids to be able to tell me when something is not right. He is crawling and cruising quite well, so hopefully he will get along with the other babies. I think he may be one of the youngest ones, he just turned 9 months old. Babykins was around 18 months when I tried it last time, this time, almost 29 months and she is ready to play with other kids now. It is so bittersweet thinking about my kids, they are growing so fast and I will never have this time again. I had my tubes tied so I know there are no babies in my future. Each and every little thing they do makes me want to smile and cry at the same time. Before I know it, Ansley will be dating and Joey will be playing baseball and talking about girls... At least I hope its girls. Whatever my kids do and want, I hope they are happy. And responsible. The subject of the double standard between sons and daughters came up the other night. Now I feel there will be NO double standard. What is good for one, is good for the other. I hope I raise my kids right and teach them equality and self worth. They are so close in age that I am going to lose both of them around the same time. Unless of course I have loser slackers that try to live at home forever, but we can hope this does not happen. Oh well, I need to try and get some sleep.